Monday, February 25, 2008

Seals at work

Today I feel I'm working at Sea World... with all of the seals barking.

Apparently, there is some "thing" going around and loads of people are sick. The evidence is either unoccupied cubes or loud coughing that sounds as if they're hacking up lungs... you pick.

Obviously, I'm doomed. I'm taking bets who will be next out of the office because some loser in the vicinity won't go home.

So here's the dilemma - if you are sick, do you come in to work and hope you look like a martyr or do you stay home and look like a slacker?

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Pixies and the door man

Why is it that young, corporate Pixies think their Royal Highnesses are exempt from having to open doors at work?

Why is it that when someone (me) has her hands full with bag, purse, coffee and other misc. bag(s) and a Pixie just stands there at the door?

Why is it that Pixies act as if they are searching through their overpriced, ugly purse for their badge?.. knowing full well it isn't there.

Why is it I have to use my badge to allow access to the building with full hands? Are all Non-Pixies required to wear company access badges for Pixie-entries?

And why is it that the Pixie then stares at you as if you are a Door Man because they won't even open the door that I just provided access, with full hands?

My #1 theory is that these Pixies are the same shallow, no-brain, Meanies that never grew up from Junior High.

My #2 theory is that Pixies haven't figured out how to open doors yet.

Monday, February 18, 2008

Be my Valentine

I work where there is an abundance of Valentine product, so I've become immune to most holidays. My family always receives the obligatory cards - but they also are recipients of all other holidays including St. Patrick's Day, Easter and Thanksgiving. My card list used to include my oldest niece and nephew  - but they've outgrown cards from their Aunt - except the ones with $ enclosed. My Valentine card list included my parents, my in-laws, my husband and my 3 young nieces and nephew.

For the little ones, I always send stickers for that particular holiday, too. And most envelopes have stickers placed on them that I reserved for myself. I sent out my Valentine's this year from Florida - thinking that would be fun. I brought all my supplies with me, including extra fancy-schmancy stickers.

The Valentine's I received this year were from my parents, my husband and my brother's kids. The card from my parents was also sent from Florida on the same day I sent mine. And it had MY stickers on the envelope. This is what I get when I tell my Mom she can have the extras.

My husband's card was not the usual card from him - he must have felt obligated to purchase a card at a store where they'd been picked over by nervous husbands. I have a feeling he felt pressured to make a card purchase this year - which is not something he needs to do. Needless to say  - there is a "wife" card proudly displayed next to the tv right now.

My brother's kids sent us cards too. My sister-in-law makes art projects out of card sending - so they were individually hand-crafted by a 4 year old and a 2 year old. These are the best kind of cards - as you know the little person who worked on them really thought about you as they crafted them.

There's one more card - it is from a guy at our local Chipotle. It's from Chiptle Ray - the guy who cleans the tables and greets customers and gets you refills. A really nice guy - but can be annoying - as he likes the ladies only. And if you're with a friend who's a hottie - he'll be on you like white on cilantro lime rice. So kudos to you, Chipotle Ray for taking the time to make Valentine's for every female customer on the 14th... customized with your name and Chipotle's logo.

Friday, February 15, 2008

Step Cat

I have a step-cat named Rumba. In 1997 I met her at M's apartment.

Issue #1:
I've been a "dog person" my whole life.
Our family had three dogs over the years...
Spot the Dalmation that ran away. Heidi the Puerto Rican Beagle who was given away. And the dog of my life, Alex. A male black Lab who stole eveyone's heart.

Issue #2:
Rumba is an old, orange and white tabby cat that is over weight and is hard to love. She's a tubby-tabby. Plump Rumba. Her belly is so big it hangs and almost touches the ground. M said she was a sick and skinny kitten... her figure proves she obviously has overcome her sickness and is having no difficulty finding the food dish. Many mornings her head is in the way of the food as M pours it. Rumba is the definition of a bitchy girl cat. She is not afraid of people or noises - but she does run when she hears the vacuum cleaner. Her favorite toy is a ribbon or string. She has seepy eyes sometimes and has a stinky butt. We have to help clean her, which is tramatic to her and us.

I heard an expression the other day that someone's dog is on the "tee of the 18th hole"... Rumba is not quite there, but she is in the second round for sure. Because of this - she basically gets what she wants now.

Rumba has no problem voicing her opinion. She has a way with being LOUD when you're trying to watch tv, talk on the phone or sleep. When we married and brought her into our new home she even tried to boss me around. Apparently she was accustomed to being the Alpha Female. I swear she would actually "hmmmph" at me with her attitude. And I know she would have flipped me off if she could back then. I was capable of training a 120 lb male lab, so surely an 18 lb + cat. HA! It took years to figure her out. And I'm not so sure I have. So instead of fighting her, I've become a good kitty-mom and have accepted her as-is. Stinky butt and all.

There's a special place in my heart for our Rumba Girl - she's a gentle soul and even though she doesn't require much, we make sure to give her special time. Her routine is basically sleep and eat and allowing her to have quiet time.

When I get home, I can be assured I'll receive a loud greeting from under my bed. Stinky butt and all.


Monday, February 11, 2008

76 Degrees...

Yup - that's the difference in temperature for me this past day.
Not a freak of nature, just flying 1,000 miles north.

We visited my folks in FMB, Fla for the past week. Had a blast doing a lot of nothing. Our 4th time down, so we are pretty much officially part of the gang there (we were invited to a Superbowl party and the weekly Monday night sundown party). I could get used to the retirement thing... just need the $ to do it. damn.

Ate loads of typical Southwest Fla food: grouper (crunchy & blackened), shrimp (buffalo), salmon (blackened) and stone crabs (2 lbs worth).

Saw Lovers Key again - found shells but no lovers.

Many pelicans this year - a couple had yellow feathers on the top of their heads - looked like a funny blonde toupee. They are pretty darn cute - except a man got bit last year. On the beach is 8 pelicans per 1 fisherman. Thieves! I've decided if I ever fished there, I'd just give all my catch to the pelicans. Even though they might bite, they'd be irresistible to feed due to their cute factor.

Saw dolphins, but not as much this year. A pod of about 5-6 were fishing yesterday at about 7:15 a.m. and they were even slapping their tails. Pretty cool. Maybe they were waving "bye" on my last day.

On our daily beach walk (me shelling, and M walking fast and having to stop every 5 min or so for me to catch up), we saw a stingray about 5 feet into the water. It was brown with light polka dots. It's tail was really long and it was sporting a bad scar on its back - probably a fight with a boat, and the boat won. We walked along with it for a while. It was low tide - he (we named him Ray) must have been looking for breakfast.

Our trip ended when we couldn't open our garage door. Not sure if it was the cold, the ice or something else. And of course, we didn't have all our keys with us. And M going out in the snow, cold and WIND with his Fla. "warm" clothes on was really crappy. Glad that our neighbor is skinny as he slid under the door to save us a locksmith charge.

Went back to work with a tan to show off in 4 degree weather. Nice. Of course, we both wore white to show off the tans even more. No sense working that hard sitting at the beach & pool just to cover it up with a turtleneck. I'm really tan for me, but M is about PMS 7517 brown. jerk.

Some people noticed and mentioned my tan - but some looked at me as if I was weird or something - as if I was green, not brown. (I'm PMS 7515 if you're checking).