Wednesday, April 23, 2008

The saga of the screened in porch - UPDATE

I rushed home through traffic last evening to be home at 6:30. Our handyman was to show up at that time to make his final repair. By 6:55, I thought he was a no-show. Why did I even get my hopes up? As soon as I was falling back into a "why won't he call or show up" rant, I heard noises on the porch.

These noises could have been a couple of things – so I wasn't quick to investigate. Lately, weird noises have come from the cats, a bird freaking out because it is stuck in the porch because of the hole, or the cats freaking out at the bird that is stuck in the porch because of the hole. I wasn't looking forward to any of these.

The noise was our handyman fixing the porch. He was ticked. The late phone call by the new "bad cop" M worked. Maybe too well. I had to think quick, as the last thing I wanted was a pissy handyman, especially since we had not been given our bill and the job was not complete. There are certain people you don't want to piss off: your waiter BEFORE you get your food, your mechanic BEFORE you get your bill and completed work, your dentist at any time, as well as your OBGYN – for obvious reasons. I've added handyman to the list now.

I apologized for the late call from M, and said made him look like the dummy, not me. That will teach M not to be there when we have an appointment at 6:30. Yes, I threw him under the bus as fast as I could. As soon as I mentioned M forgot that it might be late to call if you have a baby, the handyman snapped out of his mood. 

An hour later, and me doing small-talk with him, the job was finally finished. There is no way I would have been able to do what he did in that hour. It is just not in me to stand the wrong way on a ladder on a deck, pound on the side of a house and get the screen in the right way. It is about as bad as me trying to sew or bake. Just not happening.

I never told our handyman any of my prepared speeches for all the rantings in the past 5 months. I just couldn't. I know I can be a real beast, but thought it was not necessary.

Am I really that nice and don't know it? This is the guy who didn't return my calls for 5 months after all. He surely had it coming. Maybe I am "all talk and no action"? I must be slipping. Or maybe – just maybe I was so glad to finally have the porch fixed sans $5 doors, pillowcases, holes, birds and bird poopy that I actually forgot to be pissy. Needless to say, I have a porch to clean and prepare for the season. Let's hope nothing else needs repair around the house, as it will be September until our handyman shows up.

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